dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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