Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize
