so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
