if only i could text you this smell
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
