I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Randomize
