are you still at the devil's house?
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
