How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
