it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
