no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
