I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize