Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize