Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize