super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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