She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize