Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
