Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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