no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize