that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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