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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
