last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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