I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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