butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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