After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Randomize
