You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize