Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
