love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
