you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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