She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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