You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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