You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
