They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize
