He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
