I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
