Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
