Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
