let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
