some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
