i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
