check it out our google latitudes are spooning
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
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