She is in my trunk
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Randomize
