Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Holy sore nipples Batman
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
