you would pick up someone in the library
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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