I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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