my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Randomize