why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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