if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Randomize
