At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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