Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
