My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
