I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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