I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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